Attending Events Alone – A How To Guide

I’m coming to you live from Bar Harbor, Maine today!  This trip is about taking some time off to explore New England and eat my weight in lobster.  It’s off to a great start!  This town is the most adorable little town ever. I never want to leave! Stay tuned for a full run down of my trip soon on the blog.  For now, back to our regularly scheduled programming. For today’s blog post, I’m sharing my guide to attending events alone and how to rock it like a pro.

Last week I was invited to a Victoria’s Secret party at the London House Hotel in Chicago.  This was a real-deal, full hosted event by Chicago-based blogger Oliva Rink and Victoria’s Secret Angel Martha Hunt.  When I saw the invitation, I didn’t even think twice about responding with a “yes.” I was in no matter what!  I knew attending events alone was hard for me, but it didn’t really sink in until a couple of hours before the event.  I haven’t been to a party alone in a very long time. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever attended an event alone.

As I got ready for the party I started to get nervous.  Nauseous, sweating and ready to pass out nervous.  I needed to calm myself down and do it fast. Attending events alone scares me to death!  Mike tried to help, but as sweet as he was, it didn’t help.  He reminded me that I can do a lot of things alone.  In fact, for my day job I fly across the country alone, stay in a hotel alone, eat meals in public alone and meet with people I don’t know and build relationships with them.  While this is all true, it just wasn’t the same as attending this party alone.  All that other stuff I do for my job (which I enjoy very much), but this was different.  I still can’t explain how, though 😊

I got myself ready and out the door I went to the party.  Like a little bird spreading her wings I walked myself to the London House alone, gave myself a little pep talk and went inside.  The party was actually a ton of fun. The food was delicious, the drinks were tasty and the swag bag was amazing.  I ended up meeting a lot or great people and reconnecting with a couple of girls I went to college with.  It truly is a small world.  Most importantly, I DID IT! I accomplished something that I didn’t think I could.  In the grand scheme of things going to a party alone seems pretty small to compared to buying my first home at 25 , staring a blog , writing and publishing a book, obtaining all my financial licenses for my day job, but it was a huge accomplishment for me!

Getting outside of my comfort zone is very hard for me to do and I’m sure it’s hard for some of you too.  Attending a party alone is hard for people who live inside their box a lot.  Fear not I have a few tips for attending events alone and rocking it!

Give Yourself A Pep Talk

Yes, actually talk to yourself.  Get all the jitters out of your body and clear your mind.  Your biggest obstacle in life is your head.  You can talk yourself into and out of anything.  While the mind is a powerful tool, it can be your worst enemy.  Don’t let it take control and bring you to into a negative attitude. Guide it to the positive.  Talk yourself into doing something alone and I bet you can accomplish it.

Set Mini Goals

The purpose is to challenge yourself, but you can take baby steps to do that.  If you are going to a party alone give yourself a time limit that you have to stay at that party.  It’s easy to go and leave after 10 minutes, but what fun is that?  Tell yourself you are going to stay for an hour and then check in with yourself.  If you are truly miserable after an hour, then leave.  Chances are the hour will fly by and your jitters have gone away.

Introduce Yourself to People

It’s almost certain there are other people out there who are attempting the same thing you are at the same time.  If you are friendly and introduce yourself to someone, it will come back to you.  It’s very easy to walk up to someone and say “Hello, I’m Amy” and see where the conversation goes.  I bet you already know how to have a conversation, you do it every day all day long and don’t even realize it.  Use those skills and get to chatting.

You Aren’t Going to Die

I can guarantee you, no matter how nervous you are, you will not die from it.  Plain and simple, you will always live!  Things are hard and attending an event alone is hard, but you will live through it every time.  It may be painful and uncomfortable, but you will survive and come out on the other side.

Practice Makes Perfect

My mom used to tell me this all time when playing the piano.  I never believed her, but she was right.  The more you do anything the better you get it at.  Start small and do something alone that seems achievable and then work up to a bigger task.  The more you do it, the more your nerves will be calmed and the more confident you will be doing things alone.

Let me know about your experience with attending events alone.  It can be anything from eating alone to traveling alone.  Let me know in the comments below.